Days feel long@ respite

I don’t really know how many days past but I’m un well, will I ever be well?
This is something I thought about mental illness sucks as i took my lunch time meds ,people look at you differently, i know my latest pieces of battling to process and my husband’s questions there something that makes me battle to answer my brain can’t find the answers. .

Yesterday was worst I think my anxiety and voices forcefully came out by me throwing stuff and breaking glass at respite I tried running from it ,but it was Anna who made me sit and talk it out whether it made sense or not,till 11.15 she stayed from the afternoon talking it through. Night came I was petrified and again it had me up running around outside till I was exhausted of the fight that i found glass and cut myself staff tried helping but i was so verbal, mental health was called now all I know is I’m getting more antiphychotic meds hopefully by tonight
It’s not me is all I know. .but were did me go?