Help please more insight needed

Has  anyone out there had thyroid problems created possibly from using eppilum or any other meds…
My bloods returned yesterday with hyperthyroidism and dr thinks it’s related to eppilum. ..so she’s reducing it starting immediately to come off …
Im petrified! !

Dealing with relentless feelings

Iv started new meds for my intestinal endometriosis, and   im feeling the effects almost worse at present .So yesterday I took myself off for more bloods to be done and stopped off at the pharmacy to find out if this was okay or normal Groan its working like it should until inflammation has settled will it stop these symptoms…so that’s all good I supose,im not overally excited  about the symptoms I must admit.

Monday was therapy and yuk I was faced with crap left right and centre enough to carry me through the last few days ,and to feel like giving therapy up for good …I think its the whole piece of exposing myself and then you leave and its full on in your face and you alone again battling through…Of lately I wish for my last really good space about two and half years ago were I handed it over and took such great care of me physically and emotionally t was as if I was new again.

Side tracking a little i was woken Wednesday morning with Facebook messages of which I pay normally little attention but one caught my eye been my brothers child and my mom asking her to get someone there asap it was urgent she had hurt herself   …I immediately rang my brother who lived down the road from mom got no reply few seconds past he txt saying he was driving behind the ambulance mom had broken her hip,there’s so much going on as she had major back fusion a month and half ago and now this and not to mention just last week was evacuated from her flat due to mountain fires across the road raging and threating her home and others,This is the same woman who been to hell and back from drug addiction to living homeless loosing us kids then rehabilitating  and joining a family continues to be a journey ill never know how she does it or feels it! My mom now  lays in a public health system that is horrendously run by a  government that funds little “very sad “She doesn’t even have a pillow to lie on so we’ve brought from home some ,But nonetheless we appreciative for there help  but she lays with little pain meds and a broken femur clean break into the groin area and we substitute pain meds with Dr advice from our pockets until then she awaits surgery which could be two weeks still ahead “Just crazy”

So naturally I was exhausted last night our boys first day at college went well hooray I also had an interview at 4pm yesterday ill know tomorrow but I still had a house to tidy at 7pm for a property inspection and fell into bed at 8.30 EXCHAUSTED only to wake gasping for air every few hours so guess im now even more beyond sanity.

Health

So Friday I had our dr for bloods and an on going issue of extreme pain in right side which had flared up once again. ..

well she was examining me an internal examination I hate them so ,but so was necessary she discovered and was pretty sure before hand that some like a colonists was happening, during the examination she noticed I had endometriosis of the colon and was spreading to the cervix enough for her to see obviously ,so I’m now booked for a scan and was put on antibiotics. ..my bloods today came back for my pregnancy and they were confirmed negative apparently anticonvulsant s can give false readings, this Wednesday early morning I’ll have my cortisol levels tested and will give more ideas of my symptoms. ..
But for now I’m trying to relax my colon is so inflamed I can barely eat yet go to the toilet.

Unexpected

There’s an alot of emotion going on we have just done home pregnancy test and at this moment it looks positive, the feelings of my abuse are ripe and I’m holding myself daily in a cocoon to protect me …we see a dr Friday to comfirm my anxiety !

For our son

These are some feelings that remind us we wont back down ,we”ll be by your side till its over….

 

overwhelmingly not ready

There’s  a need to say what I’m feeling what’s happening but there’s of much ,instead of praying and asking god for his hand in all these things happening which would seem much easier “Dare I say I cant even find myself in his presence ” IM ANGRY

Theres stuff happening with our older gay son ..I wanna cry WHY..we love you yet words seem endless. ..his system is fighting against all odds and it’s hard to be near to watch. . when you dont want us near!
Tomorrow is our youngest birthday his 15 and Wednesday our oldest is 21 but with every reminder of births I suffer amense anxiety of my rapes. …

This is my last week of work too but the hardest in reminders of my pain!

Thunderstorms and sunshine

Well a happy new year to all my fellow friends I hope and pray its a beautiful year ahead for all with loads of growth looming!

There’s beauty in growing slowly I always think its the magic of it coming slowly that surprising and lovely to look at wow look how far we have come !!

And as I leave these pieces I hope to catch up soon as I have loads to unfold.