Late yesterday afternoon a lady joined seemed pretty normal. .well no brain injury at least. .it wasn’t long when it was carting all her precession with up and down the stairs I became aware she was anxious. .then she would get up sit down multiple times asking do we go upstairs now or were..any were clare you can move around were you like oh ok! Grrr
Then she was following me then a new staff came on and she started that lady is screaming is she dying. .oh by then fuck off I wanna just dye..leave me!
I started having a panic attack and the new staff noticed I’m fine thank you but I wasn’t. ..
I had to get prn and honestly I had no choice I walked the farm in the semi darkness till 11 pm I was told try sleep. .
Night dragged and I fell asleep and was woken again by clare up down eventually I got up to see if I could help but staff were all around and people were talking loud. ..they noticed I was stressed “me to myself this could be you lis” calm down!
I was woken at 8 by Kerry a lady in her early 60s. ..humbleness comes to mind to describe Kerry. .I came down got breakfast and went to get meds were we spoke briefly about clare. .it was that moment as we spoke she felt I battled I broke down and cried she gently spoke you can do this journey stopping and taking care of you is a must ,ask others to move away nicely tell clare you healing to..I can’t
You can you important to lis I’m here till four today and I’ll be walking with you stop running nurture just you starting today!
She’s just fetched me from my room to do a college on my pain and moving forward how it will look? I don’t have a clue. ..
Maybe her gentleness is my beginning!